Insane Asylime

Friday, June 09, 2006

More Sex Ed a la Lime

You all seemed to like the last post so much I thought I'd go way back in time to show you what a long standing tradition this is at Chez Lime.

Limelette #1 was in second grade. She already knew boys had sperm and girls had eggs and the two had to meet for a baby to happen. It was all very abstract. She wanted a better grasp. Mr. Lime had just had a vasectomy and was laying on the couch with an ice pack in his crotch.

Mommy, why did Daddy have to have surgery if he wasn't sick or hurt?

He had a special surgery so we don't have any more babies.

Well, what did they operate on?

Mr. Lime groans, 'We are not having this discussion...'

Yes dear we are. Honest questions get honest answers. They cut the tubes that let the sperm come out of his body.

Where are the tubes?

Inside his privates.

So where do the sperms come out?

Through his penis.

When he goes pee?

No, at times when Mommy and Daddy are alone together.

How do the sperms get to the egg, exactly?

Well, where does the baby come out?

(Limelette's wheels begin to turn and a look of revulsion comes over her.) You don't mean your butts have to touch????!!!!

Yep, they do in a manner of speaking.

EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!! That's disgusting!

Groans from Mr. Lime on the couch followed.


  • Hilaaaaaaaaarious! I love it. It's my next pickup line: "Let's touch butts." I'll let you know how I fare.

    By Blogger gnightgirl, at 8:52 PM  

  • Well that just nails it! I am sending the girls to Auntie Lime for a bit-o-education!! LMAO!!!

    By Anonymous snavy, at 11:10 AM  

  • Aren't they beautiful when they are young? It's a pity they wouln't stay that way.

    By Blogger 60 and counting, at 12:40 PM  

  • gnightgirl, lemme know how that works out for ya!

    snavy, let me know when. we'll have a grand time!

    60, lmao!

    By Blogger lime, at 4:38 PM  

  • wow...!!! i can comment on this one...!!! too funny

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5:44 PM  

  • dont mean he puts his thing in her thing and? :O NO way! IM tellin mom!

    By Blogger barefoot_mistress, at 10:19 PM  

  • Now see, I have to keep Mr. Logo from going into too much detail.

    "Just answer the question, hon, he is not asking for lovemaking tips, he's 10!"

    By Blogger Logophile, at 3:49 AM  

  • Heh I love you Lime! Your stories ROCK!

    By Blogger Blither, at 3:49 PM  

  • OMG OMG.. I'm turning red just READING this post.. muchless living it. Gah.
    It was funny cause on the trip, my friends were making fun of me cause I get embarrassed by sex talk sooo easily that I started to blush and I often cringe at the words "sex", "penis", "fuck" .. gah!!

    By Blogger DaMasta, at 2:41 PM  

  • oooohhhhh - Q

    By Blogger QUASAR9, at 6:21 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home